Posted in GETTING PAST YOUR PAST, Survivor Resources

From Chaos to Calm: How Organization Can Help us Cope

I started to use cleaning as a coping mechanism when I was a teenager. There was a service porch off the back of my house that was originally meant to house a washer and dryer. I converted it into my bedroom and it was the first space that I had all to myself. It hosted a single mattress we found in the alley and a lamp I bought from a homeless person on the boardwalk for $20. (I am pretty sure I overpaid for this but it was the perfect shade of mauve.)

And how could I forget the space heater! The room was uninsulated and that space heater was my most prized possession, keeping me warm in the cold, damp Venice winters- I know, this is dramatic coming from someone raised in Southern California. We did not have central heat so it was VERY cold to me.

It was in this little space I discovered the joy of minimalism.

So much of my life felt completely out of control. But this tiny little space was something I could control.

My rest of my childhood home was like a scene from hoarders. There was an entire section of our hallway that we could not access because it was filled with items stacked floor to ceiling. The kitchen floors had a film that made your feet stick to them when you walked. The rest of the floors were so dirty, if you walked across the house barefoot your feet would turn black. Dishes were piled like something from the mad hatter’s tea party in a basin of cold gray dishwater. The bookshelves in the accessible part of our hallway had a layer of dust so thick you could measure it with a ruler.

And don’t get me started on the ant and roach infestation. The ants ate holes in our clothes. And the roaches- think Arachnophobia the movie, but with cockroaches. It got so bad we went to the pet store and bought geckos and released them inside of our home. Fat, happy lizards could be found perched in curtains or on the wall above your bed. You cannot make this up.

But my tiny little service porch sanctuary was clean and tidy.

Since then, cleaning and organizing has become a major coping strategy for me.

According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, the physical activity of cleaning coupled with the end result of a cleaner home helps reduce stress, feelings of anxiety, and depressive symptoms

Cleaning and organizing aren’t a replacement for therapy and recovery work, but it sure is a nice addition!

Organizing has become my love language. Keeping my home tidy is one of the ways I show love to myself.

Here are a few strategies that have helped me make organizing a practice.

Start With One Space

One drawer, one closet, one cabinet. Organization is not an event, it’s a practice. Taking it slow and starting with one area at a time will make it less overwhelming, and more attainable.

Purge Regularly

I keep a bag in the back of my closet for Goodwill and place things in it throughout the year. Then, once a year I do a full purge. In the weeks before my children have a birthday, I help them go through their room and let go of the toys, clothes and items they no longer use. I like doing this before birthdays and Christmas because we are creating space for new things. We go through everything and decide whether we will keep or give each item.

Only Keep What You Use, Need, or Love

When you purge, only keep what you use, need or love. Organization expert, Marie Kondo, encourages people to keep only the things that spark joy.

A Place For Everything & Everything In Its Place

One of the best ways to stay organized is to make sure you have a place for everything. And then, put things in their place. I even have a little tray for my junk pile of paperwork. It’s still a junk pile, but the tray makes it a little less. In my closet, I have a basket for clothes that I have worn once and want to wear again before washing. This keeps me from piling clothes on the chair in my room.